So okay, I did a lot of big bad things to protect my family and its future. I fixed up the doc's letter so it said the right stuff; that wild-ride story sure got out of hand; I thought Andrea Gusty knew she was supposed to trash those photos and videotape -- we would have been better off without them. All those Palin-gates are sure gonna be a big pain. And now Shelly Johnston’s silence is going to be hard to guarantee. Diana’s too. Levi's for sure! I just have to pick up after everyone. Yeah, it’s been stressful; and yeah, I’ve had to stay on my toes, and take some abuse.
But I tell you, I’ve gotten a close-up look at that big life I always wanted – hanging out with all those famous people, having them need me on the team, my picture in the papers all the time, the endless helpers, the clothes details all worked out, the giant budgets for everything, the photographers everywhere. I learned about all those fancy ways those rich east coast folks have, but those crowds were cheering for ME! Pretty interesting for a little nobody who thought she’d be stuck in Dasilla forever. I got my weight down so I look just as good as all those rich bitches who’ve never had to sweat or scramble in their lives. No up-to-your-elbows-in-fish-guts for those folks every summer!
Okay, I lost some hair, too, but it’ll grow back.
For now, it’s all I can do to cope with how Shelly’s drug bust is turning out, Levi giving his interviews and spilling a good many beans, Diana’s burglary and child-endangerment, Brystol’s nagging me for her stuff, Podd getting all demanding all of a sudden, and all those other messes that are brewing.
But, hey -- I’m good.
Either I can keep the lid on it all until it dies down again, like it always has, and people kind of forget, or I let the book be a real tell-all, and make some big money – yeah, that’s what the agent dude told me. I just have to fill in all the details. No problem.
It’s all to progress the family, which – you know -- is the only thing that matters to me. That and my faith (Scientology is lookin' pretty good right about now). And Alaska.
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Starting at 2:10, Shannyn Moore, Alaska radio host, explains why Sarah Palin says "NOT MY FAULT !"
Problem: Levi could talk.
Yeah, my hair will grow back now that I'll have less stress.
For more about Greta Van Susteren, her husband and Scientology, scroll down to "PART 3: The Barracuda Triangle - Mr. Coale, Mrs. Palin and Mrs. Coale."
So now that it's all over but the shouting, Sarah: what will you do? |
